Assalamualaikum.. at this time i write this is around 3:48 am , OMG.. kau buat ape seh Ain? Sembang kata nak tidur awal.. hmm.. Eh , by the way.. this week I puasa . So , memang seperti mood berpuasa lah kan yang ada masa untuk bersahur.
I shouldnt write this , but somehow... this is my place.. Kalau lah orang boleh nampak , how I care for , kalau lah orang boleh nampak.. how my heart is.. people will cry..
Ahhhh , I hate this part.. the journey at this moment buat I cannot brain.. Hati i pecah yang sepecah pecahnya...
I baru nampak senampak nampaknya diri I. I baru lihat ..diri i yang sebenar benarnya..
Yang orang nampak kuat.. yang orang nampak suka bercakap.. that the way I am..
Truth is.. Im just Me..
I am very thankful.. for this journey.. who i have a chance untuk sit on my pain.. who at this time. I can betul betul tahu dan sedar. This is me .
"THE DAMAGE HAS BEEN DONE"
THIS WORDS REALLY TRIGGER ME.. I jarang jadi netizen , i jarang amek port hal-hal viral.
But this time , bila mata dah sebenar benar terbuka luas.. OMG .. i cry ..
What am i doing at this moments?
That words "the damage has been done" really trigger me..
And I sit back and ambil nafas for myself.
Selama ni , I over care orang , I over protect orang , selama ni... Yang ada dalam kepala otak is this problem happened need to find the solution.
Allahuakbar..
Selama ni , I allow myself to make people using my strengh..
Selama ni , orang tak nak pun solution dari I.. they just want me .. to be Listen .
Selama ni , orang meng tong sampahkan I tanpa i sedari..
Selama ni , i have been use.. because of orang nampak yang i ni pandai ,ada information..
Selama ni.. I tak sedar langsung.. because to me achievement is everything..
I cry.. like i said.. The damage has been done.
I took all the responsibilities for what it is..
I dont know who gonna read this blog, probably YOU who really care about me..
I just wanna say thank you so much from the bottom of my heart..
If someone yang baca ni, people that i know.. Im soo sorry for being to harsh for you..
Im so sorry for cakap kasar.
Im so sorry for marah marah ,being garang..
Im so sorry and I really admit that.. the damage is done by me..
Selama ni , tanpa i sedari.. i allow myself to be told in a public mode.. to be post in social media..
Sometimes , the personal story of myself.. let just be personal.. stay as it be in PERSONAL..
I didnt realize it . I allow the things to be happened.
HMMM..
I KNOW WHO GOING TO READ THIS IS THE PERSON WHO REALLY CARE ABOUT ME..
I'm just me.
And , thank you.. so much especially to all circle of people yang selalu ada untuk Ain.
Im so sorry if i am lack of expressing my appreciation words to you and you..
haaaa, rasa lega after i blog it ..
Xoxo ,
Sheisfarahain